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Your tender touches tracing trapezoids down my spine give my legs stacks of goosebumps. Your tender kisses that end up in all the right places make my toenails tingle. The twinkle in your tremendous eyes mesmerizes me to the point where I want to fall for you over and over again. I want to waltz with you underneath the stars and kiss underneath the full moon. Take my hand baby and don't be afraid. I won't let you fall as long as you trust me to hold you close.
I have spiderweb veins and a crooked left elbow and sometimes, my right eye develops a twitch, but that doesn't mean that I don't see you clearly. You're the poet to my tree and maybe you've taken up residence in the fort I used to pretend was Australia because sometimes at night, I catch glimpses of someone moving out there. Then again, I've always had a big imagination and maybe that's all our conversations really are. Me making you up, because no human could stand so still or talk without breathing or have hands like steel. Maybe you aren't real.
I want to hold you, touch you, kiss you so bad that I just want to reach through to you. I want to grab on to your shoulders, clutch tightly to you, and never let go. I want you to feel like I'm there with you...to feel like I'm always going to be with you. But sometimes, in the middle of the night, as I'm calling your name...it seems like you aren't listening. Maybe I'm not there to you. But I'm here...standing right behind you. Waiting for you to reach for my arms and wrap them around you for comfort. Do you believe that I'm real? Or am I just a figment.
I have hummingbird heartbeats and a galaxy of freckles and sometimes, I think I feel your hand against my shoulder, but when I turn around all I glimpse are shadows. You visit me at night when there are storm clouds on the moon and you whisper about skeletons in your closet and business you still need to attend to and I never understand because your voice is muffled by my pillow, but I still catch your drift. I told my friends once that if I listen closely I can still hear you talking to me like you did that night over the phone, but when my eyes filled up with tears I had to stop because they'd already turned away and maybe they're right to tell me you're no longer here. Maybe you really are gone...but I wish that you weren't.
Every conventional and unconventional approach to reaching you has failed. The whispering in the leaves, the appearing to you in your dreams. I still love you, even though that something seems to have happened. I'm sorry. I remember waking up in the middle of that field during the bonfire, but not being able to feel a thing. I'm better now, promise. I can still feel the beat my heart makes for you, still knowing that I love you, that has made me numb to everything else. I just want you, happy and smiling; I'm afraid of what really happened that night.
I have trembling fingers and I'm writing my goodbye to you. I visited you yesterday, the place everyone claims that you're resting, but cold gravestones have never put me at ease and I just need to know why you had to leave but I guess I'll never be told. You had rose-petal eyes and my name tattooed on your heart and today, your mom made me give back your sweater and I miss you. I miss everything about you, but I think I miss your smell the most. Chocolate chip cookies and a hint of mint cologne. Please, I don't care what the world is saying now. Just come back.
I still can't believe it. I found you in the cemetery standing at my grave, and tears in your eyes. I attempted to pinch myself standing behind you, but the realization had already set in that I had died that night. I really didn't mean to leave you. I loved you so much as a flesh-and-blood being, and I still love you now as a ghost. I miss your lavender and pencil shaving smell, and I miss how your smile lit up your eyes when I walked through your family's door. And babe, I don't want you to suffer any longer. I'll look into haunting, and maybe...just maybe, I can leave you one last sign to let you know that I still love you. I want you to be happy, even if it's with another guy...just don't forget me.
I have spiderweb veins and a crooked left elbow and sometimes, my right eye develops a twitch, but that doesn't mean that I don't see you clearly. You're the poet to my tree and maybe you've taken up residence in the fort I used to pretend was Australia because sometimes at night, I catch glimpses of someone moving out there. Then again, I've always had a big imagination and maybe that's all our conversations really are. Me making you up, because no human could stand so still or talk without breathing or have hands like steel. Maybe you aren't real.
I want to hold you, touch you, kiss you so bad that I just want to reach through to you. I want to grab on to your shoulders, clutch tightly to you, and never let go. I want you to feel like I'm there with you...to feel like I'm always going to be with you. But sometimes, in the middle of the night, as I'm calling your name...it seems like you aren't listening. Maybe I'm not there to you. But I'm here...standing right behind you. Waiting for you to reach for my arms and wrap them around you for comfort. Do you believe that I'm real? Or am I just a figment.
I have hummingbird heartbeats and a galaxy of freckles and sometimes, I think I feel your hand against my shoulder, but when I turn around all I glimpse are shadows. You visit me at night when there are storm clouds on the moon and you whisper about skeletons in your closet and business you still need to attend to and I never understand because your voice is muffled by my pillow, but I still catch your drift. I told my friends once that if I listen closely I can still hear you talking to me like you did that night over the phone, but when my eyes filled up with tears I had to stop because they'd already turned away and maybe they're right to tell me you're no longer here. Maybe you really are gone...but I wish that you weren't.
Every conventional and unconventional approach to reaching you has failed. The whispering in the leaves, the appearing to you in your dreams. I still love you, even though that something seems to have happened. I'm sorry. I remember waking up in the middle of that field during the bonfire, but not being able to feel a thing. I'm better now, promise. I can still feel the beat my heart makes for you, still knowing that I love you, that has made me numb to everything else. I just want you, happy and smiling; I'm afraid of what really happened that night.
I have trembling fingers and I'm writing my goodbye to you. I visited you yesterday, the place everyone claims that you're resting, but cold gravestones have never put me at ease and I just need to know why you had to leave but I guess I'll never be told. You had rose-petal eyes and my name tattooed on your heart and today, your mom made me give back your sweater and I miss you. I miss everything about you, but I think I miss your smell the most. Chocolate chip cookies and a hint of mint cologne. Please, I don't care what the world is saying now. Just come back.
I still can't believe it. I found you in the cemetery standing at my grave, and tears in your eyes. I attempted to pinch myself standing behind you, but the realization had already set in that I had died that night. I really didn't mean to leave you. I loved you so much as a flesh-and-blood being, and I still love you now as a ghost. I miss your lavender and pencil shaving smell, and I miss how your smile lit up your eyes when I walked through your family's door. And babe, I don't want you to suffer any longer. I'll look into haunting, and maybe...just maybe, I can leave you one last sign to let you know that I still love you. I want you to be happy, even if it's with another guy...just don't forget me.
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This is another collab with the wonderful 
, who wrote the italicized regular sections.
I wrote the italicized subscript sections.
GOGOGOGO show him some love!
September 2010
, who wrote the italicized regular sections.I wrote the italicized subscript sections.
GOGOGOGO show him some love!
Your tender touches tracing trapezoids down my spine give my legs stacks of goosebumps. Your tender kisses that end up in all the right places make my toenails tingle. The twinkle in your tremendous eyes mesmerizes me to the point where I want to fall for you over and over again. I want to waltz with you underneath the stars and kiss underneath the full moon. Take my hand baby and don't be afraid. I won't let you fall as long as you trust me to hold you close. I have spiderweb veins and a crooked left elbow and sometimes, my right eye develops a twitch, but that doesn't mean that I don't see you clearly. You're the poet to my tree
September 2010
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Comments11
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This honestly moved me to tears; probably because I really didn't see it coming. The progression of it is wonderfully and when it all clicked it...hurt.
BTW, your descriptions ("I have spiderweb veins" "hummingbird heartbeats and a galaxy of freckles" "You visit me at night when there are storm clouds on the moon") are a win.
BTW, your descriptions ("I have spiderweb veins" "hummingbird heartbeats and a galaxy of freckles" "You visit me at night when there are storm clouds on the moon") are a win.