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The Prompt (Number Three)--
- You are to take one of your favorite songs that has either a direct question or a lyric that could be asked as a question: Who, What, When, Where, Why and/or How AND possibly the occasional If. You are to have your Main Character find the answer to this question... in 24 hours.
(No, you don't have to write the thing in 24 hours, that would be insane. Maybe another time.)
You do have the option of having the MC ask the question or be the recipient of the question. This is a prompt that any literary genre can write so I'm looking forward to a lot of submissions.
In your artist's comments, I want to know the name of the song and what it means/meant to you, don't just pick something at random (something meaningful to you will yield a better result). And I want a link to either lyrics or a YooToob video as proof it really exists.
There is a minimum word count of 5000 words (yes, MINIMUM -- give us something thick and meaty to read) and it's due at the end of May. I also figure that many words would be a good way to really let you flex your creative muscle with lots of action, emotions, dialogue and intrigue.
So. The song I chose was Within Temptation's Our Solemn Hour. The question--"Can we break free from chains of never-ending agony?"
I chose this song because... Well, I've been through some personal situations that feel sort of like what the song is suggesting... Chaos, struggles, wondering if I'm ever going to be able to break free. So that's what it means to me.
Have a listen here-- [link]
April 2011
Mature
© 2011 - 2024 betwixtthepages
Comments6
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In person, I'm pretty sure I would want to hit James upside the head with a baseball bat.... constantly. But he was actually fun to read because he's strays from the norm and he's constantly naughty in his dialogue, lmao. I also like that he seems a bit complex. Like, there are hints of kindness in him he just won't let you see that side of him.
I love Demrie's character in this. How at first, she's all touchy about her innocence, denying that she isn't what she is in correlation with how her parents treated her before she died. Glob that's heartbreaking. It's like, you just want to reach through the screen and tell her her parents were freaking jerks.
I LOVED the bit about them being magnets to lightening. That was a pretty awesome concept and made me think of that typical "Zeus striking you with a lightbulb" scenario. As if the gods are judging them for what they are.
The part where they drank up the children really got me too. It put a horrific spin on them. That moment you think, "oh they're not so bad" and then BAM. Drinking sweet little children. *cringes*
Here were a few things that you might need to work on.
Sometimes I lost track of who was saying what in the dialogue. I would suggest adding some dialogue tags in every once in a while or stage direction just to guide the readers back to where they need to be. To be quite truthful, I thought this would make a fantastic script.
Again, I spotted a lot of ellipses, but because there was so much dialogue I think I noticed a lot of filler wording as well.
There were places I spotted a typo or two such as this it's a nice feeling, a comforting one. I can give it a more heavy readthru if you would like a second eye.
I may be reading over this too fast as well, but you wrote in the dialogue that James belched and I don't think he did in the content of your actions.
All in all, I liked the story and I liked the characters in this one!
I love Demrie's character in this. How at first, she's all touchy about her innocence, denying that she isn't what she is in correlation with how her parents treated her before she died. Glob that's heartbreaking. It's like, you just want to reach through the screen and tell her her parents were freaking jerks.
I LOVED the bit about them being magnets to lightening. That was a pretty awesome concept and made me think of that typical "Zeus striking you with a lightbulb" scenario. As if the gods are judging them for what they are.
The part where they drank up the children really got me too. It put a horrific spin on them. That moment you think, "oh they're not so bad" and then BAM. Drinking sweet little children. *cringes*
Here were a few things that you might need to work on.
Sometimes I lost track of who was saying what in the dialogue. I would suggest adding some dialogue tags in every once in a while or stage direction just to guide the readers back to where they need to be. To be quite truthful, I thought this would make a fantastic script.
Again, I spotted a lot of ellipses, but because there was so much dialogue I think I noticed a lot of filler wording as well.
There were places I spotted a typo or two such as this it's a nice feeling, a comforting one. I can give it a more heavy readthru if you would like a second eye.
I may be reading over this too fast as well, but you wrote in the dialogue that James belched and I don't think he did in the content of your actions.
All in all, I liked the story and I liked the characters in this one!